Monday, May 31, 2010

On Memorial Day.....

On a day like today I am filled with pride. I love Greg and I'm so proud of him for the sacrifice he and so many others have made. Freedom is a wonderful thing. And I wish I could wear this shirt everyday so everywhere I went everyone would know just how much I care :)

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

I missed him more than I realized

Greg just got home today from training. He is tired from being up for 4 days straight during the 10 days he was gone and he needs a shower, but I still gave him a big hug and had him snuggle with me on the couch for a little while. While in his arms I thought about how when he was gone I felt like I was fine but being with him now makes me realize how much I love and missed him. And the thought of him leaving in Sept. weighs heavily on my heart. I just keep thing,"A whole year? That is just too long." But again I remind myself to enjoy this time now. I'm so glad he is home and I love that we get to have dinner tonight as a family.

Friday, May 21, 2010

My Husband, My Hero

Some days I just sit back and think, "I can't believe I'm the wife of a soldier." I mean that kind of life style is for other Moms I see, but not me. You know the ones that are always moving from place to place with a smile on their face and popping out kids while their husbands are deployed like it's no big deal? I guess when I married Greg the thought of him joining the army never even crossed my mind. I remember when he first told me years ago that he was thinking of joining the National Guard, I was shocked. I mean my little farm boy husband? A soldier? I just couldn't even picture it. But I remember feeling comforted that he was joining the reserves and was going to get his degree so he could become an Officer. I figured by the time he was done with all of that the war would be over. Ha! Boy was I wrong! Now we have what? About 3 months before he is deployed. Man how little I knew. But even though he will be missed and I worry for his safety I can not even begin to explain how proud I am of him and All the joy I have felt over the years. The army has truly been a blessing in our lives and I want to be that strong wife for him. My husband is a great man and I love him so. He is a hero in my eyes and I am so thankful for the life we live and the freedom we have because of the choice he and so many others made to protect all of us.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

The Girls Miss Daddy

I decided to start a new blog apart from my family one devoted to my thoughts and feelings on being the wife of a soldier. I don't really know if anyone will read this or ever care to comment and that is fine. I just want to document this time in my life for myself. My husband is being deployed to Iraq this September for our first time. We have two little girls ages 3 and 1 and I am a stay at home mom. To be honest most days I am completely fine. But yesterday was hard. Greg is gone right now for 10 days doing training....always training. And Eva my 3 year old is really have a difficult time. She asks for him a lot and the past few nights she cries in her bed saying, "I miss my Daddy." It is heartbreaking. More so because I know that in September I can't tell her he will be home next week. I know once he is gone she will get used to it but it's hard. It really is difficult to see my little ones miss their Dad and know that to them a year means nothing. That concept of time just doesn't apply for them. Layla my one year old seems fine but she had been waking up really early and is more clingy than normal which again makes me think it's her own little way of showing she misses Greg.
And as for me? I'm fine, or so that's what I keep telling myself. I have also had a hard time sleeping. I can't fall asleep unless I leave the T.V. on and even then I toss and turn for hours. Last night I think I fell asleep by 1. But when Layla wakes up at 6:30 that doesn't give me much of a good nights rest. I get board during the day but the worst is dinner time. I find it hard to sit down at the table with the girls. It's just too sad and lonely trying to make conversation with a 3 year old when I have already been with her all day. So I stand at the counter and unload the dishwasher or do something to keep me busy. Sometimes I get a little overwhelmed at the thought of having to do this for a whole year. I just keep pushing the thought out of my head. I guess we just need to get through this next week and then Daddy will be back....for now.